A funny little thing I noticed,
while driving around town.
And when I say funny, I mean downright dangerous.

See, I have always been curious.
How come when I am on a stop light,
and the light turns green,
it would probably take at least 5 – 10 seconds,
before the cars in front of me start moving.

Seems like the cars right by the stoplight,
hesitates for a couple of seconds before they
step on the gas.

And when I happen to be up front,
I start going as soon as the lights turn green.
And no car seems to follow me,
for a good couple of seconds.
And I always wondered why.

Any driver out there knows,
that the traffic lights operate sequentially.
So by the time I realize it’s going to be my turn,
I start getting ready to go.

You know, it’s usually clockwise, Taking turns.
Those who are on a straight thru traffic first,
followed by those vehicles turning left.
All these, in a given amount of time.

Anyway, back to my story.
I just thought that the majority of drivers here,
doesn’t pay any attention to the said traffic sequence.
That they are not always prepared to go, as soon the light turns green.
(I mean, besides everyone continuously yaks on their cell phone)

Then I came to realize,
these people are smart.
They got it all down right.

The reason why no one starts moving right away
when the light turns green,
is because,

There will always be one or two assholes
who tries to beat the red light.

It’s true!!
It’s a freaking way of life down here!

They see the light already turned red,
and they still slam on the gas like
a one-legged guy in an ass kicking competition.

No wonder that everyday,
there’s always a car wreck.
Actually as I am writing this,
there was a breaking news flash on TV,
Saying that there was a head on collision
on an intersection about 10 miles from where I live.

You know why there’s a lot of accidents?

Too many drunk drivers.

Too many stoned drivers.

Teens, along with their friends in their borrowed car,
trying to act cool, hollering at people.

Little Mama’s boy over there with his supersonic, bass thumping stereo,
blasting like the asshole he is.
Oblivious to anything that is happening around him.

Super low self esteem guy over there, in his modified bike muffler,
Rev-ving like he wants his bike to fart bullets!
Trying to let everyone know that he’s passing by.

And speed demon over there too,
trying to prove to everyone that he may qualify for Nascar,
weaving in and out of traffic, giving himself a boner
everytime he cuts someone off.

There’s always someone dying from an automobile accident.
I always hear the Ambulance, Fire Trucks and the Police sirens
about 10, 15 times a day.

This may be acceptable if you live near a hospital,
a fire department or
near Danny Bonaduce.

But I am not.

And with the new law Florida has,
that allows you to shoot first and ask questions later,
there are only two things that comes in my mind.

First,
I knew I shouldn’t have skipped anger management classes.

And Second,
My God! I am going to die here!

Anyway.
Here are some cool links for you to enjoy,
to give you the illusion that I am
not scared for my life.

How to swear in different languages —> insults.net – (pop-up)
A free program to get rid of telemarketers —> phonetray.com
Bouncing Panda —> rubytooth.com
Unleash hell —> freeworldgroup.com
Test your lightsaber skills —> lostvectors.com