I remember when I moved to North America,
one of the best policies I have learned is “Warranty.”
They actually honor the warranties on any product you purchase.
Within a certain amount of time, of course.
But some even give you their guarantee for the whole product’s lifetime.

How cool is that?


I have returned Stereo and Electronics stuff
that broke before their warranties were up.
And they replaced it.
Clothing and shoes were exchanged if they don’t fit you right,
or if you’re just not happy with them.

Smart phones that I have tried and used. Returned.
Just because I didn’t quite get the reception,
voice clarity or features I wanted or expected from it.
All replaced and exchanged before the warranty ended.

Even when someone gives you something as a gift.
You can exchange that too.
People who actually care about you,
worry that you may not like their gift,
or you may already have the same thing,
have the courtesy to actually give you the receipt
so you have the choice to have it exchanged.

All of this, can be arranged and taken care of
if you just go talk to the company’s customer service.
Whoever or wherever you acquired it from.

How cool is that?

I don’t remember this when I was growing up in the Philippines.
I remember a lot of “No Return. No Exchange.” signs though.
Once you buy it, you’re stuck with it.
You buy something and it breaks the next day?
It’s trash. Forget about it.
It’s kind of like,
“Nice doing business with you, now Piss Off!”

I told you that story
to give my next story some substance.
It’s more of a question, really.

If something is wrong with your body,
Who do you return it to?

What if you are not happy with this “vessel?”
Your body, which in fact, given to you
without you knowing its quality,
just turned out to be in very poor condition.

Frail.
Weak.
Not to Par.

Who do you complain to?
Where do you return it to?
Every single part of this body is susceptible to damage and pain.

Now, I am not talking about abusing the body with whatever chemicals one takes.
Or purposely subjecting it to dangerous conditions.
That’s totally the user’s fault.
I am talking about the stupid shit you cannot control.

Like, “aging.”
I hate how the body degrades with age.
It starts to fall apart.
Some sooner than later.

Back and neck twists.
Knees and hips give way.
Bones get brittle.
Eyesight gets blurry.
Skin dries and wrinkle.
Hair and teeth falls out.
Hearts break.
Minds lost.

If you ask me,
That is quite a flaw in the overall design.

And all you did was live your life.
Use this body as how it was supposed to do.
To help you “live your life.”

But how can you do it, when your body won’t let you.
Wouldn’t you want a new one?
A different one?

If you weren’t happy with it,
Wouldn’t you like to have the option to choose what you want?

Or maybe if you know this vehicle given to you is of low quality.
Wouldn’t you want your pleas to have it fixed, be heard?
Who do you bring your problem to and expect immediate results?

Some would say, “Your body is more like a gift from a friend.”
Yes, sure. But shouldn’t my friend ask me how I feel about the gift?

And if we’re really good friends,
Shouldn’t I be able to say what and how I really feel
without hurting their feelings?
“The Gift? Oh! I like it, but there are a couple of problems with it.

I don’t know.
Maybe it’s just me.
I am more scared of getting old than dying.

I got stuck with something I didn’t really want in the first place.
But I took it.
I’m just unhappily stuck with it.

I would like to have it repaired.
Fixed at least.
I can’t have it exchanged.
I wasn’t given that option.
I didn’t see the fine print.

Oh well.
I don’t know.
Maybe I am not lucky enough to get a good one.
Maybe I got screwed.
Maybe I got one of those
“No return, No Exchange” things.